options

Remember when you were in gym class and you had options to choose who you wanted on your team? Well, it's very similar in relationships, you can choose one person or choose many. So when you're in what you thought was a committed relationship, you don't want to be made to feel like a place holder. Often, in these situations one person isn't willing to fully commit, they want to have their cake and eat too. That's not how relationships work unless you've discussed it and you both agreed on that type of relationship. When you’re lead to believe that you’re in a committed relationship then all other options cease and desist, this includes any side hustle, porn, talking to someone with intentions for sex or sexual favor or flirting with other individuals. Often, this person should realize that if they choose to entertain other options, then they shouldn't be foolish to think that the other person shouldn’t have those same options. Relationships aren't meant to be one-sided, it's supposed to be reciprocal. If you're wanting options then don't disrespect and string along the other person. The person wanting options will sneak around and hide what they are doing, as if the other person doesn't know. So with that being said, this question is for those entertaining other options , what do you want out of a relationship? What does a relationship look like to you? Why emotionally toy with another’s emotions? When in a relationship you should should communicate what your wants and needs are because it is unfair to the other person not really understanding why you treat them like the consolation prize instead of the prize. I can say from experience that this is a very hurtful and frustrating situation to placed into. If you're wanting a committed relationship there should be no eyes for others, no want or desires to be with others and there should be self control over those things. It is heartbreaking when the side options become the priority instead of their partner. I wouldn’t want to be put in that type of position where I would have to choose to be with someone or to walk away. Fair is fair, if your not being made to feel like your that person's priority and their world, then what’s the point of being in that relationship, unless you both agreed on that type of relationship. It's a selfish act because they get to satisfy their needs and their ego while the other person's emotional, sexual, and mental needs are neglected, this is called mental and emotional abuse. The other person may have had betrayal or abandonments issues that were never resolved and they project that on their committed partner. Mental health issues that you cannot resolve on your own needs to be addressed by a professional in order to get through and heal from those issues.