infinite paths

Lately, I have been thinking about my future. The future holds infinite paths and which to chose is hard because of it's uncertain destination. I feel heart broken and sad that certain events in my life have not been going as I had hoped. I also feel that this may be a sign from God that I must leave that behind. I've realized that I cannot control anything outside of myself and I am done trying because it's just too exhausting. Ultimately, it's my responsibility to protect my heart and my mental peace. If things are meant to be in my life then God will make it happen if it's in his will. I cannot force outcomes only my own. God has blessed me with so much and am so grateful for even the little things and the things that I cannot see. Situations happen in life sometimes to show us parts of ourselves that need to grow and mature. I have grown and matured so much that when I stare in the mirror I am no longer who I used to be. There has been so much knowledge that I have gained through my experiences that I didn't realize I needed to have. Also, there was so much emotional maturity that have gained and it's so amazing how different I feel and see myself now. I look in the mirror and I truly love myself and all I have accomplished and how far I have come. Circumstances, in my life tried many time to kick me when I was down or try to take advantage of my love and kindness. Many people think because you love and are kind that it gives them the right to stomp and take it as a weakness. I will never stop loving or being kind because Christ never stopped loving me or being kind to me. He guides my steps and although I am uncertain of my future, I am not afraid because I know that he leads my way.